Trigger Warning: Transphobia, Rape, Assault, Hate Crimes, Murder
So I got this in my submission box. Normally I’m a lot calmer then I’m about to be but this actually made me livid. I’ve been fuming about this for days and I’m done letting this slide.
The original message:
Hello. Lately I’ve been receiving a lot of hate from people calling me a transphobic cis person for speaking out against people being rude to cisgendered people, even though I am neither transphobic nor cis (at least, I don’t think so, I honestly don’t know my gender/sexuality). I have some questions I am genuinely really confused about and would like to know the answer to.
Firstly, why is it whenever someone on Tumblr takes on an egalitarian approach to life (love each other for who they are), they get such a serious backlash? Here is an example of what I mean (possible trigger); http://glassicproductions.tumblr.com/post/74316507404/goliosi-nokiabae-xirl-grouchostalin Why is it such a beautifully worded comic must be shunned by the people who reblogged it like that? What warranted that response? Same goes for this (also possible trigger); http://i.imgur.com/uNeK8bb.jpg
Another question I have is, when does the ‘venting’ that you advocate for on here and on your DCP blog go too far? I am all for people being upset about their problems and venting about them, but I don’t see venting much anymore - I see tons and tons of this (again, possible trigger);
http://i.imgur.com/VMHWs.jpg (threatening rape, which I thought was against the rules of the DCP blog?)
http://dearcispeople.tumblr.com/post/20360587564 (excluding LGBT cis people, like my girlfriend who is bi and cis)
Sorry for all the links, but I really just wanted to prove my point here. It’s beyond discouraging to repeatedly see stuff like this, and I would like to know your opinion(s) on all of it. Thanks.
You spent a lot of energy collecting links and gathering this. I’m sure you’ve spent a lot more arguing with people about this. Let me share a few links of my own:
A trans woman was beaten by police, while in custody and in handcuffs, because she wouldn’t respond to “tranny” when called. And when the officers were fired she was “mysteriously shot” with no serious investigation.
This is the point I’m trying to make - you are pointing to all of these trans people who are feeling scared and hurt by cis folks around the world and acting like they are the ones being irrational. By saying “yeah, but you shouldn’t be mean to cis people, that’s not nice either,” you’re trying to put occasionally dealing with someone’s venting on the same level of being raped, assaulted, and murdered.
Almost half of the trans population will attempt suicide. Half. That goes up to 60% for trans women and 75% for trans women of color.
You are twenty times more likely to be young and homeless if you are young and trans.
When was the last time a cis person killed themselves because of the abuse of a trans person? When was the last time a cis person was brutally murdered when someone found out they were cis? How many cis people are raped by trans people “to try and fix them?”
When you can clearly and honestly answer those questions, you can understand why I don’t really care that you’re offended by the hate some trans folks have. Because we’re dying out here and you’re complaining about the paper cuts the little bit of work saving us is causing you.
The comic you posted, by the way? No. It doesn’t work like that. You are an oppressor whether or not you mean to be because you take part in a system that oppresses us without trying to change it. And no, this is not what trans people feel. We feel fear walking down the god damn street, we feel fear using the bathroom or talking to people, we feel fear that we’re today we’re going to die because someone doesn’t like that we’re trans; not that someone doesn’t like us on the internet.
Should trans folks, in theory, grow up? Yes. Are there some trans folks that take it too far? Yes. But let me go through the links you posted.
First one was random hate. I don’t know the contexts.
Second one is a person who has deep seated emotional reactions to the constant abuse hurled at her. She’s trying to not hate herself, and considering how much she talks about not liking huge parts of herself it’s clear to see the constant abuse is wearing her down. The fact that you see someone, who was in serious emotional pain about constantly feeling like they are unsafe and ugly, as an attack on you is kind of telling.
The third one is not threatening rape. It’s saying “when you make trans women use the men’s room, you are putting a woman with men.” It’s calling out all the feminists who think we should be arrested for using something as basic as the right bathroom. It’s a shitty thing because making trans women use the men’s room is LITERALLY throwing trans women into the situation you were pretending trans women might, at some point in the theoretical future, make for you in the first place.
The fourth one is a joke. Considering the real organizations we’re thrown out of, the feminist movements that actively seek to discriminate and hurt us, and the large number of feminists who think of trans women as “lesser women,” you can learn to take a joke.
The fifth one is someone immature saying something stupid. Congrats and welcome to the internet. So is the sixth one, but the sixth one at least seems like a reaction to pain. And the last one is saying you don’t get to call yourself LGBT if you’re just LGB or LGB friendly. It’s saying you don’t get to say you approve of trans things without actively doing something about it.
My point is this - you are putting your energy into telling the people who are regularly being abused and hurt by random members of a group that includes pretty much every single person around them that they shouldn’t be so mad at that group.
Do you seriously think this is a good investment of your time? Trans folks are being slaughtered and you want to debate if it’s mean to say something like die cis scum?
When you equate your pain to that of trans people, you erase the reality of the situation to make yourself more comfortable. You plow over the people you’re supposed to be helping to give more room for your ally statue.
You are transphobic.
You are not an ally.
You’ve gone from being an oppressor by compliance to actively hurting the community you’re talking about. Think about what you’re doing because you are exactly the problem, not part of the solution.