Artivism Project's: Ask a Trans Woman

A blog for anyone to ask questions to an LGBT activist/former EMT/someone who's been studying the trans* movement and the science behind gender, transitioning and trans women. Anonymous questions are ok - just be mature and sincere.

Anonymous asked: i need to come out, but... i'm just so scared my parents won't take me seriously... and that it's going to ruin my life... and people will mock me... but i need to come out. how do i work up the courage.....

If you need to come out, then you don’t need to worry about working up the courage. When it’s bursting out of you, you’re going to have to let it out. Eventually, a time will come when the internal pressure overcomes external pressure and you’ll transition into who you were always supposed to be. Just be patient.

Anonymous asked: How late is too late for mtf transition? I know you can't give me a definitive answer but I'm turning 18 in a month and I've just barely begun to come out.I'm just deathly afraid of what might happen if I can't get HRT for a matter of years.

There is no “too late” to transition. There are dates when testosterone poisoning will have set in, but you’re young and will look beautiful when the hormones kick in. Best case scenario is before puberty, but worst case scenario is in your fifties and you’re way away from that. Estrogen and hormone therapy will still be affective when you’re 18, 19, 20, etc. I started HRT when I was in my twenties and I still turned out half decent!

fucking-glam asked: I am 16 years old. my parents won't allow me to start hrt until age 18. How do I convince them to let me take hrt at 16?

Show them Kim Petras, then show them a picture of someone who had to transition later in life. Tell them it will have a huge impact on the rest of your life if you don’t transition before testosterone poisoning sets in.

And remember, if you want to start HRT I’m assuming you’re in therapy, so your therapist is going to be your friend here. Bring your parents in, have the therapist explain that it’s not a fad, it’s not going away, and it will have a huge impact on your body’s development if you start transitioning later.

Anonymous asked: hey. first of all, i love your blog and i'm glad that it's available for people to read - it's really cool to see something like this. anyway, i have something i'd like advice on: i'm a cis woman who is working on a webcomic, and one of the main characters is a trans woman. i was wondering if you could offer any advice on portraying her. she has a huge role that is largely independent of her gender, and i have most things figured out, but i was wondering if you had any advice. thanks c:

Yeah - remember the non-permanent nature of a lot of transitional stuff. Makeup fades. Tucks untuck. Don’t make this a prominent feature or anything, or try to make jokes about it, but remember this can be a reason they have to go home suddenly or they suddenly have to use the restroom to touch themselves up.

Anonymous asked: I've read that in some countries, in order to have your legal sex changed, you must pass some karyotype test to make sure that what you'll have in your papers will match your biological (whatever it means to the author) sex. I am not exactly sure how to understand it - as far as I'm concerned, HRT doesn't have the power to change the chromosomes from Y to X, as they carry different kinds and amounts of information. Or does it? :)

This doesn’t mean what you think it means. It means they have a safety loophole for people who have documentation problems but AREN’T trans.

Anonymous asked: Hey! I'm a cis girl, and recentlh became really great friends with a trans girl who can't come out publicly or transition due to safety/job security reasons. She's been having a lot of issues with dysphoria lately, and I was thinking of making her some kind of care package or something to cheer her up. Any suggestions for stuff to put in it? Thanks so much!!

Ok, I’ve been thinking on this one for a bit. Here goes my list:

  • Clear Nail Polish
  • Mean Girls on DVD
  • Facial Mud/Facial Creme/something to give yourself a facial
  • Scented Hand Cream
  • Candles

But that’s just what I would want in their shoes. Your mileage may vary. In any case, good luck with your awesome thing you’re doing for your friend!

the-spooky-agender asked: Hey! so, I'm trying to put together a master post of trans support and advice blogs - I'm mainly looking for advice, safe spaces, resources, etc. Is it okay if I include you on it? And can you suggest any others that I can include? Thanks - Riv.

You can absolutely include me on it. I’d be honored.

And as for who I can recommend, go check out ask a trans guy! 

Anonymous asked: My friends brother is transgender but I think he only tells certain people. I know he's openly told people in his work place that he is in fact a boy if they address him wrong but I also know he hasn't told some members of his family. My question is that sometimes I'm unsure if I should use he/him all the time when I'm not sure who he wants to know and who he doesn't? I've gotten used to using he/him now I'm afraid I'll slip in front of someone hes not out too.

Ask him. You’re asking the wrong person.

Usually it’s going to be a judgement call. Your friend may or may not have rules they’d like people to follow, usually simple like “if I’m around my family just use female pronouns” or something similar.

Coming out and transitioning was the most difficult and dangerous thing I’ve done in my entire life. I literally risked absolutely everything— my job/career, my friends, my family, my financial stability, my home, my LIFE, really— for the opportunity to define my identity on my own terms in way that felt genuine to me. When someone says or implied that I was “born a boy,” it feels like I’m being shoved right back in the box that I risked everything to escape. It makes me feel like I can’t ever truly get out from under the fact that I was assigned male at birth, that I’m permanently tainted in people’s eyes. I’m admittedly very fortunate— I don’t get mistaken for a guy pretty much ever, but when people say things like “when you were a guy,” it’s a gut-punch reminder that people still remember that false identity very clearly. It’s still misgendering, even if it’s happening in past tense. It suggests that being a woman was a choice I made at mid-life and an aspect of my being that wasn’t “true” until I got a doctor’s stamp of approval. It defines my womanhood as something that only began when cisgender people were able to see that I was a woman just by looking at me.